Can’t remember what wearing only panties feel like

For several years, I’ve bled everyday. Huge blood clots passing everyday.
I’ve struggled with anemia, dizzy spells, memory problems, depression.
Having a relationship has been the hardest thing to do all these years. Even having friends is a problem. Can’t go swimming, can’t go drinking.
I will literally bleed through with clots. I can’t even use tampons because of the amount of bleeding and clotting.
I want change. I wish to be better. I have a fibroid in my inner cavity of my uterus as well as multiple polyps.
I don’t have insurance as my job doesn’t cover for it. I wish to be a normal woman.
I’m in my 30s and my future seems so lonely. I just wanna have a normal lifestyle.
I wanna wake up and not change my bedding everyday because it’s blood stained.
I just want to be free from this 15+ years of bleeding bondage